Miss You Chimera...
It is with the most heaviest of hearts
that I write this.
Yesterday afternoon, Chimera was hit
and killed.
Not even 2 year's old-gone in the blink
of an eye.
She had seen our neighbors little boy
playing with a large plastic ball in the front yard across the
highway.
She was upset and wanted to go over and
play with them.
When my mom went to step outside to
have a ciggerette- she slipped past her and went running thru the
high way, getting hit twice.
She was rushed to the vet immediately.
There was nothing could be done at that
point- the damage was too much to her spine and ribs.
I keep hearing her thru out the house-
keep hearing her tags, keep hearing her panting, keep hearing her
walking around.
I cant take it and at 7am took Cesar
for a walk thru the woods until 4pm this after noon.
I was hoping to forget Chimera wasn't
there- but the entire walk were signs from last year of Chimera's
presence.
Tree branches she had chewed on, Holes
she had dug, even a tennis ball she had dropped and I had warned her
not to bring alone or she would loose it.
I left it behind as I could not bear to
carry it home.
Most of our walk was spent sitting on
the ground crying while Cesar sat beside me waiting for us to keep
moving.
My legs ache, and my feet are sore, I
will be stiff for the next week I am sure- But I don't care.
I just needed to focus on something
other then the Ache in my heart.
I miss her already I miss her so much
and it's been one day, one day with out her and I Miss her so much.
She was truly MY dog- she Clung to me
alway's
Cesar Loves my boyfriend whenever he is
around, But Chimera followed me, loved me, trusted me above anyone.
Before Chimera I use to dislike the
idea of a higher-energy Bully, and then when I got her- I just loved
her high energy, sure it could get tiring keeping her entertained,
But God I loved her, I loved all the things we could do together.
I got her a weight pull harness to do
weight l with her this year, started building her agility equipment
for this summer.
Her favorite thing was to have me blow
raspberries on her face and her butt, she would get so excited and
wiggle all over the place!
She had trouble falling asleep unless
she was on my lap being hugged.
She loved kids and she loved my cats
she rarely worked for food- but present
a ball to her and should would have done back flips.
My heart is broken, and at the moment
just thinking about her makes it too hard.
I remember her as a tiny puppy, I
remember her as an adolecent, I remember her yesterday morning and
what I considered to be our first REAL walk of the season-
unknowingly it was also to be her last.
Chimera, I hope you know how much I
love you, you were my girl, my baby, my Chimer-Bear.
You could be such a little shit
sometimes, but I never held it against you because I loved you so
much.
One of the things I always Loved about
you was- no matter how naughty you were, it always melted my heart
when I seen you try to be good, such an appoligetic dog if I ever
seen one I couldn't ever stay angry at you, I would walk into the
room to see you had shredded the plant and say
“what are you doing!?†and you
would drop what ever you had to come over to me and lick my hand as
if to say you were sorry and rub against me- bopping me in the eye
with your nose while I cleaned up the mess. I am going to go now,
have a few shots, a couple beers, and sit down to be by myself and
grieve.
Comments
"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."
I know you know this, but I was finally able to finish reading it today. I'm so sorry for your pain. I wish we could have a drink together and cry drunken tears.
I am truly sorry for your loss. Made me cry.
This was the most awful thing to read on Fb earlier tonight...I feel like I watched Chimera grow up. Loved seeing her happiness on the treadmill. I hope they have one in heaven for her.
I hope you and Cesar can find solace and comfort in each other.
Rest in Peace Chimera.
"It's not just a Dog, it's a Bull Terrier!"
www.bulliesofnc.com
I spent all day yesterday thinking of you and wishing you strength. And kissing & hugging my furkids 3 times as much as usual (which is a lot). I believe if we combine two pieces of common known fact and apply logic, things become somewhat clearer. First, people know people (unless they are hermits) and those that really know dogs say that "dogs are better than people". Second, hardly anybody comes back from heaven telling us all about it. I believe that the only conclusion to this is that only dogs go to heaven and can't tell us about it when they come back, (or perhaps they think we are too dumb to understand).
When we lost our Donna 2 1/2 years ago, when we finally got back the use of two functional brain cells, we decided to wait and look for litters born about the gestation period after her passing.... 6 months, or a little longer seeing as they have some R&R time in heaven, but not much, as they have much work to do on humans back here. We like to believe that our Isabella is our Donna returned to help us through life. Chimera's coming back to continue her angel duty, for sure.
Kim,
I am so sorry to hear about your little girl Chimera. She was your shining light while on this earth and she is gods shining light always looking down from heaven. Her spirit will always be by your side protecting you. God bless you in these troubled times.
I read this through tears; it is a beautiful tribute. I'm so very sorry for your loss, I know how your heart must be aching.
Im so sorry.
Ceasar will always remember. A year after we lost our male shepherd I dropped his collar. (which i had displayed with a picture on the fireplace) My female, hearing the jingle of his tags, came bolting out of the laundry room looking for him. You could see in her eyes how excited she was and it broke my heart! At least we can talk about our emotions. We can scream, cry, punch pillows or even walls but they can't.
I will be praying for you to find your ideal space. I am sure you'll stumble on the perfect place... Chimera will pave the way and guide you there for sure. We lived in a "built-up area" for 24 years after we came to the US.
It wasn't that bad to begin with, but as time progressed the congestion became unbearable, so I understand your feelings. We managed to move out here, "in-the-sticks" 3 years ago, where we have 3/4 acre but most of the properties are 5 or 10 acres..... Totally love it..... If something ever drags me back to the insane built-up world ever again, I'll shoot it.
I don't know where your page is, but if you could post the video here I'd love to see it